Posts Tagged ‘ family ’

Why do I…

Why do I feel as though the plans I have for my family and I always seem to fall through. I find us a house that I thought would have been a great little place to start our life, but it’s proving out to be more trying then anything else. The house we’re renting needs repairs, mainly to the exterior which we’re praying that the landlord will follow through on making right. The other thing that has be me upset is the fact that my fiance and I were looking to get married next month. With given our circumstances and our income (when I say our income because I work and she may not have the “9-5” job but her job is 24-7 with being a stay at home mommy, and that’s the way we wanted it to be), it doesn’t look like it’s going to happen as planned. I just wish that things were different and we didn’t have to struggle every month just to stay ahead of the 8 ball. I want to marry the woman I love more then anything but I don’t want to be deemed as a failure because I couldn’t do the one thing she was looking forward to more then anything. I just hope that with everything that is being stacked against us is just a bad joke and the punch line is coming so I can get it over with.

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On my mind…

So alot of things have been on my mind as of late. Always making sure that my family has everything that they need. Going to work with the same positive attitude everyday no matter how tough it can get. But there is a silver lining through all of my un-needed doubt in my abilities. That boost of confidence given to me by my family like He-Man gaining the power of Castle Greyskull, I get my second, third, and sometimes a fourth wind and keep pushing. But, like all things, there is always more on my mind like will the bills be paid, does our son need anything, does my fiance need anything. But when she tells me that we’re gonna be alright, I know she is right. We’ve been through tough times and had gotten by with less. I suppose that with being a man in my position in life where more things are added to my plate the further along I walk through life,all of ┬áthese worries, are all part of the plan…I’m not one to follow a plan, but I guess now is as good a time as any. I’m just thankful that my family keeps me going with all of the love and support they give me every day.

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